2004-12-05 - 10:21 a.m.
Future Christmases to Dream About...
Since I won't be giving birth until late January/early February, it will be the last Christmas that Hubby and I spend together as just a couple. We've had a great ten years all to ourselves and we'll be welcoming a new member to our family very soon. While I feel a little blue about saying goodbye to that part of my life (the selfish part), I'm actually looking forward to sharing it with the pitter-patter of tiny feet in my living room and throughout the rest of the house. It's going to be brand new next year, like being a kid around this time of year. We'll have a baby who will be almost one and he'll probably be walking, or trying to walk. The dogs will be older and the holidays, in general, will be taking on a whole new meaning for us. So, instead of feeling a little weepy about Christmases past, I'll be blogging about all the things I look forward to doing with my child when this time of year comes around again.
-holding my baby, Jack, while decorating the tree
-chasing the dogs out of the living room while the tree is being put up, not because I worry about the tree falling down, but because I worry about the baby being knocked over by them
-buying an abundance of presents for my son, all of which will need assembly, I'm sure
-spending countless dollars on batteries for presents that will drive me crazy within a week
-singing Christmas music and dancing with Jack and Hubby in the living room
-Hubby putting the Santa hat on the baby and taking pictures and movies of us
-snowball fights on the front lawn (no poop there, so it's safe!)
-bundling up Jack for the journeys to see all the grandparents
-snowsuits, boots, hats, and mittens- any way I can manage to keep Jack from getting cold
-taking sick days in the wintertime just to stay home with my son and enjoy a fresh snowfall
-getting Jack his own shovel
-stocking up on Kleenex for Jack's runny nose when it's cold outside
-teaching the dogs how to pull Jack on a sled and watching him giggle and tip over
-making cookies while Jack naps and having the smell permeate every corner of the house
-waking up early Christmas morning just to show Jack all of the presents for him under the tree
-having Punka watch the baby while I power-shop for his presents
-coming home from work to see that Punka and the baby are napping after playtime in the snow
-warming up the car before we go anywhere
-all of us snuggling in the bed with hot cocoa, Christmas movies, and both dogs
-loud screeches from Jack as he opens his presents
-loud screams from Jack as I tell him that he can't play with that now because he has to finish opening the rest of his presents!
-family naptime
-exhaustion from running around from house to house, but relief when we reach each destination safely
-all the cute outfits I could possibly buy for my son
-when he's older, he can put the stamps on the Christmas cards
-secretly wrapping Jack's presents at night and listening to him breathe while he's sleeping in his crib, making sure I didn't wake him up
-hiding the gifts
-buying a Christmas pickle and hiding it in the tree (a Polish tradition that we can start now that we have our own child)
-getting somebody to watch Jack while I do last-minute Christmas shopping for stocking stuffers
-an insane amount of food and fun to be had
-watching Uncle dance with Jack and act crazy, making him giggle until he pees in his pants (that could apply to either one of them!)
-teaching Jack how to handle our big dogs with authority (they will listen to him because I'll have a knife behind my back waiting to stab them if they don't)
-spending ungodly amounts of money on presents for Jack and not having Hubby complain about the cost of the gifts (only complaining about the cost of the wrapping paper!)
-being more excited about the holidays than my son, only because he won't fully understand what all the hubbub is about when he's 11 months old
-frolicking in the park down the street during a snowstorm
-walking to Grandma Judy's house, singing Christmas carols along the way
-"catching" snowflakes
-watching ordinary experiences become extraordinary experiences to the little person seeing them for the first time
-letters to Santa
-leaving out cookies for Santa
-having to explain about Santa
-marking Jack's height on the inside of a door each Christmas
-watching Jack pass out from exhaustion after playing with all his presents
-a quiet house during the Christmas naptime
-Jack helping Hubby put up lights
-"Oooohing" and "aaaahhhhing" at the pretty lights on the houses in the neighborhood
-snowball fights in the tennis courts at the park with the dogs
-a leisurely walk Christmas Day throughout the entire park
-Hubby and Jack singing songs about the holidays that they make up together
-Hubby teaching Jack the songs he's already made up
-making cooked chocolate pudding with a skin on top and lumpy CoCo Wheats like my Mom does and eating both for breakfast the day after Christmas
-New Year's Eve with the two most important men in my life, Hubby and Son
-buying the puppy (who'll be a dog next year) a regular-sized stocking and buying Jack the biggest stocking in the house
-taking videos of Jack unwrapping his gifts and labeling them each year; he'll watch them when he's older and I'll be sure to show them to his first serious girlfriend
-watching all of the classic holiday movies with my son when he'd rather be watching something that isn't Claymation
-being aware that my life is full of rich and rewarding moments that I'll never forget, especially when I see them through the eyes of my son
So, there you have it! Many amazing moments are waiting to happen. This house will come alive with many firsts for us, many frantic moments, many experiences I cannot even imagine yet. A new year, a new life, a new joy. I knew this house was smiling at me when we decided to buy it. Perhaps it knows something I don't know. Perhaps this house was waiting for us to make it a home. My dreams and my rewards lie within the doors of my own home.
While our last Christmas as a couple comes and goes, our first Christmas as a family awaits. It marks the end of a great era and the beginning of an even better one. I've waited my whole life to have this and I'll spend the rest of my life having it. The greatest present I have is living inside of me right now. He's warm, he's safe, and he belongs to Hubby and me. It is Jack's first Christmas; he just isn't out to see it. Next year, he'll be able to share it with us outside the coziness of my womb. And life will just keep getting richer.
Our home, our son, our love. It isn't really a goodbye to our past Christmases together. It's a hello to the Christmases we've yet to have. Every moment we've had has led up to this. And every time I look at Hubby, I love him more and more. The greatest gift we're giving each other is resting comfortably inside my body. His name is Jack and he means the world to both of us.
This Christmas is like no other I've ever had. We've created a new life, someone who can make the world a better place. The love I feel for my husband is not like any love I've ever felt before. We're on the greatest journey of our lives, the road to parenting. We may not know it yet, but the most rewarding experiences in our lives have yet to happen.
I feel as if life is just about the begin. And it's a really good feeling!
